Babywearing and Montessori
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Is babywearing Montessori? This is a question I have gotten many times about Montessori. Many know that Montessori prioritizes freedom of movement and are concerned that babywearing goes counter to that. They may also see Montessori as being about independence and babywearing as hindering that. Now I want to preface by saying in reality I don’t really care what Montessori has to say about babywearing. I love Montessori but I love following what feels right to me more and babywearing definitely feels right to me. I wouldn’t consider myself fully aligned with Attachment Parenting either, but there are things I take inspiration from there as well.
That said, Montessori actually did have a bit to say about babywearing, more about it in fact than some of the gross motor ideas we often attribute to the method.
"Well into modern times mothers took their children with them everywhere they went, because they breastfed them...All across the globe, children were attached to their mothers in different ways, some slung across their backs, some carried on their hips...Children in this position could see the world as well as the grown-ups...In this way children get accustomed to their environment, and when they start to walk they are already familiar with it, psychically speaking." Maria Montessori, 1946 London Lectures*
I would say there are several Montessori principles that align incredibly well with babywearing. The first is Montessori’s emphasis on taking children including babies out into the world. You can see that discussed in the quote above. Montessori observed that children under 6 have an absorbent mind. Babies, she observed, learn about society and language when brought out with their caregivers. Montessori spent several years in India where she was inspired by the care of infants by mothers there. She discussed that by babies being physically attached to their mother they were better able to take in their surroundings and the language than if they were in a crib or stroller. She spoke of the superiority of the method of babywearing to methods of carrying the baby where the baby is not attached to the mother;
"All the great human groups, nations and races have their individual differences; for example, they have different ways of carrying the baby...In most parts of the world, mothers put the baby on a small bed, or in a large bag; they do not carry him in their arms. In some countries, the child is attached by means of loops to a piece of wood which is then placed on the mother's shoulders when she goes to work...this satisfies her unconscious need to give her offspring the help of a full social life on which to construct himself, the mere fact of being with her brings him into contact with the world." Maria Montessori, The Absorbent Mind*
Another principle that aligns well with the practices of babywearing is “follow the child.” For one, a child is able to interact with the caregiver holding them as they wish, and sleep as they wish while in a carrier. Additionally, many babies (and not just newborns!) crave closeness with their parents. I knew this previously, but having a second child illuminated it much more saliently for me. My son loves being held to this day, though at 22 months he also loves to walk.
As a newborn, however, he would lie happily in his bassinet and in the stroller. My daughter, who is currently four weeks old, absolutely does not tolerate the bassinet. While I use the sidecar when I can at night, during the day I would much rather follow her lead and wear her. The carrier is where she is happiest. We believe she has some stomach issues that make laying down incredibly uncomfortable. Additionally, she clearly seeks closeness in a way far more intense than my son did at this age. Some children will happily play on the ground for long periods. She occasionally will lie under a mobile, but it is definitely not a regular occurrence. Following the child in her case absolutely means wearing her in the carrier.
But what about freedom of movement?
Yes, freedom of movement is discussed a lot in Montessori spheres and I absolutely believe it is important. I choose to skip most “containers” and we try floor time daily. Much of her tummy time though is on my chest- and there is nothing wrong with that! We don’t swaddle. It is true that babywearing also limits movement though.
The issue I have with this reasoning for babywearing and Montessori not being aligned is that from what I have learned, much of the “Montessori” principles shared about gross motor development and freedom of movement are actually RIE and Pikler-inspired. For example, in my Montessori certification, there were plenty of times when even propping up a baby into sitting was recommended in order for some other learning to be achieved (greater use of the hands, for example). In RIE that would not be recommended. Many who practice Montessori are also inspired by RIE and Pikler. There is nothing wrong with this but it does make things a bit more confusing. The truth is Montessori wrote a lot about movement and its importance, but not as much about it when it comes to tiny infants. Pikler and Magda Gerber of the RIE method wrote a lot more about this.
RIE is far more against babywearing. This was one of the places I strongly disagreed with Janet Lansbury in Elevating Child Care (the other being her strong emphasis on self-soothing and recommendations that sounded a lot like sleep training).
I think Montessori would have had more reservations about a toddler who can walk being constantly placed in a carrier since she does talk about the importance of movement and toddlers being given the chance to walk many times. That said, I don’t think anyone is wearing their toddler with the frequency I am wearing my newborn. There are times toddlers can’t walk somewhere and a carrier is a great option. I’m sure Montessori would have agreed.
Montessorians, be it parents or teachers, though will have many opinions on this as they have many opinions on tummy time, swaddling, and other gross motor/freedom of movement decisions.
Montessori was built for a classroom
An important reminder in all this is the Montessori method is made for a classroom. There is no one way to practice Montessori at home. One thing I love about Montessori as opposed to some similar philosophies is that it is ultimately not a parenting style. There is nothing prescriptive because it was not built for the home. Montessori is about respect, following the child, allowing functional independence, and involving children in everyday life. Of course, you can follow any parenting philosophy and pick and choose (I do this when it comes to RIE- the RIE style diaper changes where we really connect and narrate are something I love and take into my home). But when it comes to Montessori it is worth remembering that the philosophy was largely built around preschool-aged kids in a classroom. While Montessori did study and discuss younger children and did speak to parents, that is not the ultimate focus of the method.
Our Carriers
While discussing babywearing I figured I would share a few of our favorite ways to babywear. Right now with a newborn my favorite way, by far, is a stretchy wrap. We started with this wrap. I then was gifted a Hope and Plum one (homeandontheway for a discount). I love that it is in two sizes. The short leaves less extra fabric on me and has become my favorite wrap and the one I would recommend for more petite people. I also find it more comfortable than the Ergobaby one. I also have a Sollybaby wrap and love it as well (discount AYELET10). It is a lighter fabric than the other wraps which is nice for warmer weather. They also have the prettiest prints. She was born below the weight minimum of most carriers and after doing some research I felt most comfortable using a wrap. My husband, however, does not like the wrap and is using the Ergobaby Embrace which is made for newborns.
As my son got older I switched to the Ergobaby Performance which is not made anymore. I found mine used. My husband used the Ergobaby Omni360. This time I have the Wildbird carrier which I love both for the look and comfort. The cross in the back means it doesn’t fall off like my old Ergobaby did. I use it now and look forward to using it more as she gets heavier and the wrap becomes less comfortable. I also have a ring sling from them but never got in the habit with the ring sling.
For back carry with my son I still use my Ergobaby Performance sometimes, but my favorite is the Amphibababy water carrier. I also use it for when my infant needs to be held while I shower and it can be used for pools, etc. I find it very comfortable for back carrying my son and it I prefer it to my Ergobaby because it has good pockets for water bottles.
*Quotes were gathered by the Kavanaugh Report
